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How To Heal from a Toxic Relationship

Updated: Sep 4, 2021

All of us unfortunately, may deal with one toxic relationship in our lives.

You could have a toxic relationship with a friend, someone you are dating or with a family member.

Toxic behavior can include:

Mental & Emotional Abuse such as

- Controlling

- Belittling

- Jealousy

- Constantly criticizing

- Anger issues

- Threats

- Cheating (dating relationship)

or Physical Abuse such as

- Causing bodily harm

- pushing

- Hitting

- Slapping

And much more!

Toxic behavior can lead you to become:

- Codependent (having thoughts that you can not live without this person)

- Depressed

- Sad

- Angry

- Hurt

And much more!

"Do not let anyone fool you. Bad people can make those who want to live good become bad." 1 Corinthians 15:33 (NLV)

It is important to end the cycle of toxic behavior.

This starts with YOU!

You can not change other's toxic behavior; you can only change yourself.

Here are 5 Steps you can take to Heal from a Toxic Relationship:

1. Talk to God

Talk to God about the issues you have with this person and what steps you should take with this relationship. God is here to guide us and reveal some things that we do not know. God may want you to be friendly with a toxic person to show them the light. God could want you to end the relationship with the person because they are a distraction from God and his plans for you. God can lead you on the right path in any area of life if you seek him.

"I will bless the Lord who guides me; even at night my heart instructs me. I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me. No wonder my heart is glad, and I rejoice. My body rests in safety."

Psalm 16:7-9 NLT

2. Set Boundaries

Setting boundaries is extremely important in every relationship. If you would like to maintain a relationship with a toxic person, set up rules for you and that person to follow. For example, you decide to no longer hangout with this toxic friend in public, but you continue phone and text conversations. Another example, your toxic friend keeps making negative comments about your body. You ask the friend to no longer make comments on your body.

Setting boundaries can also include you ending the relationship with this toxic person permanently (that is why you should talk to God first before making a decision). Healthy boundaries can help you remain emotionally stable and heal.

"Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?"

2 Corinthians 6:14 ESV

3. Forgive

Forgive the person who is toxic to you. Forgive yourself for any parts you added to the toxic relationship. Unforgiveness can leave you in a state of negativity and stagnation. In order to continue on a healthy life path, forgiveness is key.

"Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others."

Colossians 3:13 NLT

4. Work on Yourself

Sometimes you attract who you are. If you have many toxic relationships, you may have some or many toxic traits. What traits do you need to let go of to be a better person and have better relationships? Are you more of a joyful, positive, kind, and loving person? Or are you usually more sad, depressing, mean and hateful? It is important to analyze yourself: your thoughts, your words and your actions. Work on these things to become the best version of yourself.

"Work hard so you can present yourself to God and receive his approval. Be a good worker, one who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly explains the word of truth."

2 Timothy 2:15 NLT

5. Focus

When you are healing from a toxic relationship, it is important to maintain positive thinking. Focus on being a good person. Focus on what God is leading you to do next.

For example, God may be leading you to:

- read the bible

- pray more

- go back to school

- work

- move away

- create something

and much more.

Focusing on yourself and your purpose can also help you heal and grow into the best version of you!

"No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us."

Philippians 3:13-14 NLT

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